Q: Is this a hoax?
A: No. Provided you have filled in the form correctly and I am satisfied that your request is genuine, I will post you a muffin within seven days of receipt. Try it, and see for yourself.
Q: Is this, in any sense, a commercial endeavour?
A: No.
Q: How will I know that my request has been received and approved?
A: All requests - both accepted and denied - will be acknowledged via email upon receipt.
Q: Can I have more than one muffin?
A: At this time I am only undertaking to send one muffin at a time to any given individual.
If you want another you're welcome to submit another request, which will certainly be considered. But there are no guarantees.
Q: What's to stop me from deceptively obtaining multiple muffins by pretending to be several different people - or requesting a muffin for someone else, who didn't ask for it?
A: Effectively nothing. But I will not knowingly send multiple muffins to a single person claiming to be multiple people, or to people who haven't requested one.
Requests which I strongly suspect to be fraudulent in either of these senses will not be honoured.
Q: You rejected my request - but I am for real!
A: Convince me.
Q: I live in [place far away from Australia]. Can I still have a muffin?
A: Yes.
Q: Will you send it airmail?
A: If my budget allows and I particularly like your submission, I might.
(As yet I have no idea what condition muffins sent internationally via seamail generally arrive in. Any feedback on this will be assimilated with interest.)
Q: Do you make these muffins yourself?
A: Yes. I may send prepurchased muffins in the future, but as yet I have not done this and have no plans to.
Q: I don't like muffins. Will you post me some other kind of baked good, such as a brownie?
A: No.
Q: Will my personal details be sold?
A: Absolutely not.
Q: Will my personal details be used for any purpose other than sending me a muffin?
A: Not without your permission.
Q: How can I be sure of that?
A: You can't. If you want a muffin, you'll have to trust me.
Q: Who are you?
A: Who are any of us, really? I have a blog. Maybe that will answer your question. Maybe not.
Q: Is this a Hagakure Enterprises initative?
A: No.
Q: Is this somehow related to Project 27?
A: Huh?
Q: Is there some kind of occult or esoteric subtext to all of this?
A: What a bizarre question.
Q: Why are you doing this?
A: You tell me.